The Alchemy Programmes

Seven Steps to Creating Confidence
And Banishing the Self-Critic
Taken from: Creating Confidence E-book
By Meribeth G Dayme, PhD
1. Get rid of your self-critic

2. Improve your Physical Presence
How you stand is important for your image, voice, health and energy



3. Work on your communication skills
Is your message clear—or are you giving double messages unknowingly

4. Listen fully and with a non-judgmental mind
Blank your ‘computer screen’

5. Learn how to say what you feel without blaming others
The language we use is potent

6. Have the courage to ask appropriate questions when you are not clear.
Go on a ‘research’ mission.


7. Use your imagination and power of visualization to create an atmosphere in which you want to live and share with others.

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The Alchemy Programmes present…Seven Ways to Enhance Your Presence

1. Remember, from the moment you enter a room; someone is seeing you and registering your presence. Presence begins before you enter a public arena. Your presence is comprised of: the visible aspects such as posture, gesture, eyes, facial expression; the resonance in your voice; mental aspects: including thoughts, attitudes, imagination and visualisation.

2. Work on your posture. Good posture and physical balance contribute to your energy, breathing, voice, health and image. You cannot afford to be present in mind or intention only. It is known that over sixty percent of people store information as pictures. What does your picture look like?Begin by thinking of your head being supported and stretched upward from the middle of your upper back. Use visualisation to help you feel expanded and vibrant. Places to go for help with posture include: Alexander technique, Pilates, Feldenkrais practitioners, and Yoga.

3. Breathe low in the body. Ideally, you can feel the lower back ribs move outwards as you inhale. If you focus your concentration there, you will find your breathing easier and your voice better. However, when the abdomen is tense, or the back overly arched, it is difficult to move these ribs. The diaphragm cannot move downward and the back muscles are too rigid to allow for rib movement and expansion of the lungs. This is why beginning with your posture is essential.

4. A good speaking voice is a natural extension of efficient physical balance. It is, after all, an instrument; and that instrument is your whole body. An interesting voice is one that is powered by imagination and passion. When nervous, and there is excess tension, the voice tends to rise. Imagine that you are speaking from your lower back ribs where you have directed your breath.

5. Allow your eyes to see by using your peripheral vision to take in the whole space/room wherever you are. Eyes play a key role in presence. Downcast eyes are the best way to give away your power and space.

6. Become aware of your personal space or energy field. It is your ?travelling home?and you are the hostess. Regardless of the situation, whether it is business, public, or social remind yourself of this. Every time you slump or become tense, you effectively shrink yourself and your space. This is especially true in public speaking.

7. Use techniques such as visualisation to achieve your goals. You do not need to give away your presence or your power unintentionally from poor habits. See yourself in the way you want to be seen.

WIN Conference 2005 Workshop comments (taken from evaluations):

Absolutely empowered to speak in public and use my unique abilities to enhance my speaking. Also very useful practical techniques.This is going to make a huge difference to me.

She is present, knowledgeable, fun, compassionate workshop leader.Feel Empowered, inspired, present and with lots of space.

Thank you! Learnt something and can relate with it.

Inspired Empowered. Been an issue for a while. Now I have a solution.Great.

She was amazing. Inspiring & Encouraging.Great personalityConfident to be able to change. Lots of ideas for improvement.Tecniques I can use immediately.Flexible and attentive to the group dynamics and requirements.I remember a few useful tips that I can apply quickly.

Great moderator.Feel very confident. You are very natural.Helpful for my personal and professional life. Great!Wonderful, simple techniques effective for speaking, self introduction.Extremely powerful. Very trained, caring speaker.

Fantastic. Will practice what I have learned.

Meribeth is available for Personal Performance Coaching and consultation for individuals and groups. For more information call her on:
t: 44 1344 849059 Email: Meribeth@fccake.com  url: www.fccake.com

Suggested Reading:

* Dayme, M. Creating Confidence. (e-edition 2004) e-book. Available at www.fccake.com or Amazon

* Dayme, M. (2005) The Performer’s Voice, How to Realize Your Vocal Potential WW Norton, New York and London. Available at shops, and online.
* Harrow, S. (2002) How to Sell Yourself Without Selling Your Soul.

* Tolle, E. (2004) The Power of Now, A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment, Paperback edition. New World Library, Novato California. Available at shops and online.

* Zander, R and Zander, B. (2000) The Art of Possibility: Transforming Professional and Personal Life, Harvard Business School Press, Boston,Massschusetts.